Charonquest

[wooliefrand]

WHO: Lily
WHERE: Lily Barn
WHEN: Early Day 36, post ritual!

[alright nerds lets go get your emotional support shepherd]

Comments

Re: final

[endsjustified]

[there's a rush of feeling over him, when he turns the knob. a complex knot of loyalty and care and possession and a need to hold that possession back at all times, knowing that in the end Styx isn't for him, knowing that things won't last past an assurance of life and a doorway home. attraction. anger. hurt, sometimes. vulnerability, like a part of him is always having to bare his throat to Styx and resents it a little. a deep wish that Styx could see the good in himself the way Charon sees it. that the guilt and killing instinct doesn't automatically invalidate that he chose to try to protect others, that he keeps choosing. a scrape of raw conscience: he is less willing to harm Lily in large part because of how Styx feels about it. the need to understand.

the wish to see everyone in the pasture saved started with Styx, even if it grew far larger. sand's still falling on the scale between them, grain by grain. the balance hasn't been met, but every bit matters. it matters. it matters. it matters.

the door opens.

he gets an impression of blinding silver spilling out from within, over him, through the halls, through the doors, through everything, clean and cold and implacable. and this is the additional truth he receives, in this moment, of what hid here to preserve itself:

if need be, it will kill for you, and if need be, it will die for you. someday, somewhere. but that's the least important part of it. because before then, it will know you and perceive you. it will never turn aside from you. it will plot for you. it will move what must be moved for you, whether what must be moved is molehill or mountain. it will bind you as long as that's what serves. it will let you go, when it's time to let go.

it is not omniscient, superhuman, or infallible. it has very little room for mercy, for pity, for softness; it was partially born that way, and partially shaped. but it is on your side, and it intimately understands duty and care, and for all of you, it is trying to widen its horizons.

the rush of it carries him out of the dark maze, on a sea of shining light.

...]